Halloween ngayon, o maya-maya. Kahit hindi naman ako naniniwala sa multo, siyempre, iba na rin yung nag-iingat. Kaya nga matapos kong maglunch at magkape sa isang mall, hangos na ko sa bus terminal. Kailangang kasama ko ang dalawang taong nagpapakampante sa buhay ko, lalu na ngayong gabi ng lagim. Kidding, mahaba-habang bakasyon din ito, dapat masulit!

Nagready na nga ako para sa kaiga-igayang long weekend — kumopya na ko ng mga .mp4 movies mula sa RVMC2009. Mga isang dosena din yon.

Movie tripping lang naman ako. Wala kasi yung promotor ng mga weekend lakad ng barkada. Nasa Singapore. Wala din yung promotor ng Go-go Wawer Rangers. Nasa UAE.

Pero si Pagkakataon nga naman. Lagi na lang.

Kahapon, nirentahan niya ang buong sinehan para solong mapanood ko ang Astroboy!

At ngayon, aba’y… !!!

Bigla kasing nagkururuk ang tiyan ko habang naghihintay ng bus. Kaya kesa naman makipagsapalaran — haaay.

Thinking positive, I don’t want to be negative. Hehehe. Okay lang naman sigurong mag-isa ngayong Halloween. Parang hindi na ko nasanay kay Casper.

At malay ko, baka gusto lang niya ng kasama. Considering, it’s his time to shine tonight.

Pero Casper, bati tayo ha? Don’t say “boo!”. Mahina ang puso ko ngayon e. Medyo broken.

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I changed… I switched… But I am still the same old me.

For two years now, I was using Ubuntu. For six months before that, Fedora it was. And way before that, I was on MS Win (and well, Wordstar eons ago).

And I can say, I am still a linoob, and they say, no Linux newbie dare try Archlinux. KahelOS is based on Arch and for a linoob like me, this is one heck of a trek. Whew!

Yes, I can find my way around in CLI (thanks to $ man, and the wealth and dearth of online HowTos). But my brain can’t retain further than ls, rm, cp, and some other not-so-simple. So here’s me, an ever trying-damn-hard linux end-user and loving every instance of it (yes, even failed efforts), but that’s console-speaking.

But you’d never imagine how frantic I was the first time when I HAVE TO un-use MS Win. Yes, I really have to. Part of the work environment. I remembered the first laptop assigned to me. It was a Compaq Presidio on MS. That first issued laptop and I had been fallen prey by the “Basag Kotse Gang” in Gilmore. Then, I got issued another one. It was running on MS until big boss declared — no computer or machine running on MS is allowed at 8layer!

Oh boy!

And the rest is history. No more system crashes, lost files and well, somehow, I missed the VIRUSes. But doing the switch is like losing an apartment and finding that you won a house and lot, tax free! (Or being dumped by a long-time boyfriend who you thought would be THE ONE only to be courted by an unpretentious gentlemanly debonair! hahaha!)

I am still tinkering here and there with my newly-installed Kahel OS on my Acer Aspire 4720. Good thing, the “issues” I encountered were already discussed on the KahelOS forum:

1. Slow browser refresh which is why I am currently following the instructions to enable KMS (Kernel Mode Switch)
2. Big fonts on my webpages which I will configure next
3. Sound control defaulting to minimum volume on boot up so I need to set up my alsa

What I find awesome after installing KahelOS are:

1. It has automatically detected wi-fi connections. My wi-fi button indicator miraculously came alive too! I thought it is simply just a button. Haha!
2. The integrated Crystal Eye web camera has been auto-detected too. KahelOS included Cheese Webcam Booth and in one simple click, I saw myself’s vid grinning from ear to ear (self: go get a comb!).
3. Moovida is also already installed. I still have to try this though, but I heard this is one application that makes multimedia experience a true delight.

I’d definitely be posting more of how I progress. For now, I would have to call it a night. And a good night at that.

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As of this moment, I am backing up my files by executing a copied rsync script. While rsync is in progress, I decided to use one of the “Spread Kahel” icons because Kahel is the reason why I am backing up my files. Ooh, can’t wait!

I am about to use Kahel OS on my Acer Aspire 4720.

For a few weeks now, I have been really itching to switch from Ubuntu to Kahel. Two weeks ago, when I was reorganizing my files (I still have some old files in a folder called “Backup” when I changed from Fedora to Ubuntu, then “Another Backup” when I upgraded from Gutsy to Hardy), Wonderboy JB (Joel Bryan) figured in an accident. You may not know JB, but he’s one of the wonders behind Kahel. And without him, I feel that I won’t be able to get through the “switch” in one swift smooth Kahel installation.

Blame me not for having such utter dependency on JB. For me, I’d be more relaxed doing the big leap with him to answer my every inch of curiosity on Kahel. Another thing, I want him to be personally present with his sheepish smile and bouncy stride when I do the installation. JB had been tirelessly working on Kahel for (two?) months, and my way of telling him “Great work there, Wonderboy!” is just a small encouragement for him but well-meant for me.

So where does my Kahel excitement comes from? Suffice it to say that there are reviews out there in the cyberspace, and they are more Linux-inclined than me. Those reviews too were made by those who don’t know anyone from the Kahel Team.

Moreover, I am just about to have a taste of Kahel (poor me, just about?). From this time on, you’ll be hearing (I mean reading) about my Kahel experience. And you bet, workarounds, if ever I encounter some “issues”.

And to JB (if in case he reads my blog), you better get damn well soon! Someone from the OHQ misses you a hell lot (clue: name starts with an R — take away Renan and Rosa). Yihiii!

Naulinigan kong nagbibiruan na naman ang magwishart — sina Popsy at Mumsy — kaninang hapon. Sabi ni Popsy, “Nakakahiya naman kay Jenny,” may kasama pang tawa. (Oops, Jenny nga pala ako sa amin. Hehe.)

Kaya napababa ako sa kusina.

Dugtong pa ni Popsy, “Minsan nga lang mauwi e tortang talong ang iluluto mo.”

Ay naku, eto talagang tatay ko. Isasangkalang pa ko. Peborit ko kaya yun! Lalu na kung sasamahan ng pininong sibuyas at bawang na may paminta!

Kaya ang ending, tortang talong ang ulam namin kaninang hapunan. With matching swak na swak na bulanglang na patola na konting araw na lang e pwede nang ibilad para maging loofah. I didn’t mind though. Sarap kaya nung sabaw. Perfecto!

At habang nasa hapag, tulad ng maraming pagsasalo sa tuwing mauuwi ako, hindi mawawala ang “dessert” na pagpapalitan ng kuru-kuro. Napapanahon ang topic. At hindi ako ang nagsimula — Ondoy-Pepeng tandem, si Gibo, at ang NDCC.

Buti na lang, medyo nahagip ng pagbabasa ko ang PD 1566 kaya nabigyan ko sila ng background tungkol sa NDCC na pinamumunuan ni Gibo. Dahil sa nakakaantok na hanging habagat, at oras na ‘yon ng “May Bukas Pa” na sinusubaybayan pala ni Popsy, hindi ko na nakuhang kondenahin ang implementasyon ng PD1566.

Ni hindi ko na nga nai-share na ang PD1566 and nagpasinaya para maitatag ang NDCC noong June 11, 1978.

NINETEEN HUNDRED AND SEVENTY EIGHT!  31 years ago! And look at them now?

I am boiling all over again… stop me!!! Pero masisisi nyo ba ako? PD1566’s opening clauses say:

“WHEREAS, the Filipino has always endured the hardship of a hostile environment;

WHEREAS, he has continually sought survival against typhoons, floods, earthquakes, epidemics, fires and other major calamities;

WHEREAS, the technological advances of the modern world have ushered in more lethal weaponry, environmental pollution, huge aerial and maritime disasters, and flash holocausts;

WHEREAS, there is an urgent need to direct, control, and coordinate the entire manpower material, monetary and spiritual resources of the entire Filipino nation in meeting major disasters that come our way;

WHEREAS, there is a need for a revitalized system to enhance the survival capability and economic stability of our country supported by LOI 453 against all types of disasters whether natural or man-made;

WHEREAS, there is a cogent requirement for pre-disaster planning, community disaster preparedness and positive, precise disaster control action for rescue evacuation, relief and rehabilitation to insure the survival of every Filipino in the New Society;

NOW, THEREFORE…”

And so the NDCC was born. It is now 31 years old. One salient point has been made, THIRTY ONE YEARS AGO — it is already known that we are prone to natural disasters. Our geographic location has made it that. Something must be done to prepare us, and thus enjoin the members of the NDCC, among others, DPWH, DILG, DENR, etc. to help in any way they can for disaster reduction and preparation.

Has the law appropriated enough calamity funds… sheeeeet. The calamity fund was used up. Want to guess who did?

What are they DOING?! What have they been planning to do for the past 31 years? Have we been prepared and equipped to handle calamities? Have we learned enough so that the next time a disaster hits, the damages, at least, could be reduced?

Seemingly NOT. Laguna Lake can’t breathe. Sewers and drainage can only bleed. Solid foundations slide. Huge scale loss, both lives and properties.

And here comes disaster. We all know what happened. Should we say, it was unexpected?

31 years of PD1566, 31 years of preparation for disasters. Unimaginable? Could we have lessen the effects of what we have supposed to have prepared for? What could have been done? Who should have done it? To each his own? Running a list would be like writing a story longer than Harry Potter’s.

And what are WE doing? Tiny itsy scale. Taking a blind eye that our one little act of non-chalance will not amount to anything. One little candy wrapper thrown in an open manhole. But was there just one candy wrapper blocking the drainage? One little shanty built along the danger zone in Laguna Lake. But there isn’t just one. Do I need to add one little garbage bag thrown into the Pasig River?

How are we doing? Have we become so apathetic and half-hearted to not realize that our lives have devaluated with the dollar? I bet my balls, I mean, my eye BALLS, that PD1566 is not the only law that would call for “ensuring the protection of life and property”.

We all have a hand on this. No matter the scale.

But now, after the storm, I see three sets of hands:

Those up high, and closed to a fist;

Those reaching out, and have just calmed their fears; and,

Those stretching out, palms open, still eager to get the goodies.

Damn! Galit nga ako. Napaingles na naman.

We are trying to utilize the Sahana Project (http://sahana.kahelos.org) as an initiative, and in the long run become a central hub of information in times of unfortunate events, like typhoon Ondoy.

These modules are being populated to become easy references:

• Organizations/Agencies in Relief and Rescue Missions
• Missing Persons and Disaster Victims
• Shelters and Evacuation Centers

These information are initially and currently being gathered from just about anywhere. We are currently synchronizing everything that we can from the web, tv and other forms that we can get our hands on and inputing them in the Sahana.

You can also email sahana@kahelos.org for any new information that you want to be added in the Sahana Project.

You can also post questions at http://sahana.kahelos.org/forum.

Please invite others too so we can consolidate information and have them available for everybody who needs them.

Thanks everyone.

Minsan lang ako magluto na hindi gumagamit ng mantika. Buti na lang, puno ang refrigerator nila Atenggot at inanyayahan sila ng parents ni Kuya Dino para doon maglunch. Kaya ayun, naiwan sa akin yung binili nilang kumpletos rekados para sa pork sinigang noong magweekend sila sa Antipolo last week.

Magandang eksperimento. Sinijang.

Habang pinapakuluan ko yung karne (nilagyan ko na ng asin at sibuyas), inihahanda ko naman yung mga gulay – kangkong, labanos, talong, kamatis, gabi at siling berde.

Matapos kong tanggalin yung kaldo sa sabaw, inihalo ko na yung ever-dependable sinigang mix. Konting kulo pa at inilagay ko na yung mga gulay.

Tikim muna. Medyo kulang sa alat kaya dinagdagan ko ng asin. Nang maperpekto (sa panlasa ko), excited akong kumuha ng hanguan. Gutom na gutom na kaya ako!

At naalala ko na lang, bigla rin akong nainis, hindi pa nga pala ako nagsasaing.

death.

most often, i delve on this subject just to go extreme. changing topic is more like it. when i feel cornered or when i want to veer away from a boring topic. or simply, just in tune with it.

but the truth is, this is one discussion that i don’t get tired of.

death.

call me the authority on death. (tidum-tadah!) ahm, not really.

the “Poets” (that’s what we call our *clan*), during bouts of laughs and jeers, would laugh about the way our interment would go.

i told them, during my wake, i don’t want to hear any sad songs. i don’t want anybody wearing black. and then, i want a cheering squad to celebrate my “eternal peace and happiness”. and then of course, my parents and siblings would interject that they would not only invite a cheering squad but pay for a rock band to play nonstop until i am six feet under. that’s how they would celebrate my passing away. haha!

there were also those times when we would think of what business to put up. a business that would always be a “need” and would never go out of style. where we would all pitch in for adverising ads and media releases. then, the idea of putting up a funeral parlor became a very hot topic.

so, we came up with really morbid sales pitches: buy 1 take 1 for caskets, family package, reserve now and get 50% off…

morbid, morbid.

we were laughing so hard, really. i belong to a typical filipino family — just laughing our heads off when confronted with crisis. the pinoy sense of humor to the rescue.

so here i am now, being morbid once again. thinking about death. fave topic but seldom blogged. i just touched on this once, as take off, i believe.

anyway, this is one BIG secret (now, it’s not). i almost always think about death, if and when i say bye-bye, would there really be a heaven where everything is melodic white and shining? a hell where everyone is shouting the lament of pure pain and agony? a purgatory where everyone is purged of *forgivable* sins? a bottomless abyss where no one knows what is happening? a nowhere? a nothing?

i shared this with a friend and told her, if and when in the morning, i don’t wake up, i’ll tell her what has happened to me in the afterlife. if i don’t get back to her, then there’s nothing really to worry about. just eat, live and be merry. but if i do come back from the grave, i would at least tell her where i’ve been.

awooo!

now i wonder, would i be able to escape from the after-life guards?

just in case there is one.

hmm, morbid.

but am i really? there are three things constant in life: change, life and death.

it’s just that the last is a topic most avoided.

Sabi ni Kuya Rey kahapon, kung absent siya ngayon, ako ang may kasalanan.

Pero binawi din niya. Absent kasi siya kanina. At hindi ako ang may kasalanan. Yung umapak sa likod niya. Tsk tsk. (E, Lav, ikaw ba yun? Ahehe!).

Kahit naman papano, naguilty din naman ako. Hindi niya kasi natanggihan ang aking makabagbagdamdaming text na, “Libre mo ko dinner! Or else, itatatwa kitang kapatid!” kahit iniinda na niya ang kanyang likod kahapon pa.

Kidding, ako ang nag-invite kay utol. Umuulan kasi noon sa pinagtambayan kong mall na walking distance lang dun sa pinanggalingan kong client call, at medyo may “lagnat” daw ako ayon sa nagkuha ng aking temperature, kaya naisipan kong magrelak-relak. At si bro ay isang ride lang (kung magtataxi… hehe).

At dahil na rin minsan lang naman ako “maglambing” kaya siguro hindi niya ako natiis. Hehehe.

Nakakamiss din pala ang utot! Naturingan kasi kaming magkapatid, pareho naman kaming nasa “menila”, pero minsan sa kalahating kalendaryo lang kami magkita. Siguro sa isang taon, wala pang accumulated 48 hours yun!

Nakakatuwa lang. Sa sarap kasi ng kwentuhan, hindi na namin namalayan yung oras kung hindi pa lumapit yung waiter na nagsabing “last order na po”.

Ambait talaga ni Kuya. Kasi nagyaya pa siyang magkape. Akala ko naman, sa may istarbax… Pero okay na rin. Kahit anong libre, masarap! Haha!

Nga pala, hindi ko “Kuya” si Rey. Mukha lang talaga siyang mas matanda sa akin ng dalawang taon.

Ahehe, peace, bro! At sobrang salamat. Sabi mo nga, next time, sana kasama naman natin si Atenggot. Para may libreng hatid, bago maluma yung kanyang Chevy.

If there’s anyone who doesn’t believe in second chances, it is my friend Madelyn. And if there’s anyone who has given up in making her see that it’s worth a try, it’s me.

I call her Mad, especially when she’s gregariously hyper which is most of the time. The name stuck.

We were the best of friends. The start of the school year, when Madelyn transferred at St. Clements in 5th Grade, our teacher, Ms. Gozon, seated her next to me. I instantly envied her pink Barbie-fad school bag which my parents said was too fancy for me and too expensive for them. Being her seatmate was not my only duty. Ms. Gozon appointed me to show Madelyn around, as well as make everybody her friend. I was the top student and my teachers had all the confidence on me.

Madelyn was so timid shy which my classmates took as being snobbish. And so I was stuck to be her only friend for the first few months. Months became years. From high school to college. We were inseparable.

I still can’t figure out how two totally different individuals who came from two extreme ends of society can remain friends for so long.

Madelyn’s family was devastatingly rich. And yes, you figure it out, we were poor. My parents lived and scraped for my allowance, and that of my two siblings. Good thing, I had Madelyn then who share her meals, and I, who share her my dreams.

College even strengthened our friendship. Somehow, I infected Madelyn with my study habits telling her that I may not have her luxury but I am bound to experience them soon after I graduate. She wagered and said, the first thing she’ll do when she does was learn to be independent. To live on her own. And so we burned night oils, and celebrated galore after every exam all expenses paid by Madelyn’s enormous credit limit. What would rich parents give their child who do well in school, anyway?

We were taking the same course, Clothing Technology. I chose it because my Mom is a seamstress so I feel that it’ll be a breeze to sew fashion. As for Madelyn, fashion was her style. No sweat for her.

But on the drawing table, I was better. Imagination, Madelyn was tops. Texture was my forte. Complementing it was hers. Making it work was mine. Making it saleable, hers.

Madelyn and I were not the best in class. But we were challengers. Two heads is better than one, they say. For us, it was verily true. We were happy just for knowing that in whatever we do, we can make it work because we did it together.

Until we landed on our dream job.

But Madelyn’s Dad wanted her to be part of their family enterprise; they own all kinds of things that float on water — ships, cruises, boats. All things sailing. She turned it down and went jobseeking with me.

We were hired by an international brand of jeans. Madelyn and I were separated by feasibilities, immersions and roadshows. One time, when we were both working at the office, celebrating our 1st year of regularization, Madelyn came to me and said, “Pam, why don’t we put up a boutique, you and I.”

I told her, it’s not yet time. We still have lots to learn.

But Madelyn wanted to be all independence. And so she resigned from work and put up her boutique. Her efforts, her funds, her imagination and selling ability went to “Lines”, a high-fashion minimalist trend of clothing sold exclusively in the most exclusive Class-A-catering malls and getting publicity dressing up news anchors and top actors.

She didn’t foresee competitors though. Foreign and new local brands all too willing to get the media endorsement. And her style was getting obsolete every minute.

I was in Hong Kong when I got her phone call.

“Pam, I’m closing the boutique,” she said with a sob. “I’m drained and I’m all spent out. Energy, effort and enthusiasm. And I’m not happy anymore.”

“But you know business, the first few years is the toughest. Ask your Dad!”

“That’s what I did. He said it’s time for me to join him. Manage the company. I already said yes.”

“A-are you sure? Let’s do it together, this time. Revive Lines!”

“I don’t know Pam… You weren’t there when I started. You don’t even know how hard it was for me to do it all alone. I’m sorry but somehow, I feel that your helping hand is a bit too late. I have lots of last last year’s inventory still waiting to be sold. It’s too late.”

“Madelyn… there’s still time. Fashion is a mindset and you know it. Lines has been a word of mouth and your giving up now?”

“Lines is not making sales anymore, Pam. I don’t even know where to get the money to pay my employees! It’s over for me now, Pam. But thanks. You know how I want you to know that I tried.”

“I’m sorry, Madelyn, if I wasn’t there when you started Lines but I’m for you now.”

“It’s too late Pam, too late. I’m closing shop.”

The last time I heard from Madelyn, she said there’s a corner in two of their luxury ships that still sell Lines. Those last pieces that were unsold.

As for me, I have become my own designer setting up a small made-to-order gowns and dresses shoppe.

And patiently in wait for Madelyn to finally make what we have dreamed of a reality, for her to call me and say “Let’s pursue our dream! Dress the world in style and be happy!”

Or maybe, she already did, without me. Too scared that I’ll fail her, again.

Araw ng Kalayaan ngayon! Pero hindi Independence Day ang gusto kong gunitain. Masalimuot kasing isipin kung totoo bang tunay tayong naging malaya bilang isang bansa. Kaya sa pagmumuni-muni ko, sarili ko na lang ang aking tinanong. malaya ba ako bilang AKO?

…

Ahm, hehe. Ibang tanong na lang. Masalimuot din yata ito. Nag-freeze ako for about 15 seconds. Nag-hang ba.

Ito na lang. Isang salita na paborito kong gamitin. Siguro dahil hinahanap-hanap ko palagi: tunay na kaibigan. Pwede na rin itong pang-Independence Day topic kasi nahaging ko naman ang salitang “tunay” doon sa unang paragraph. Hehe.

Tunay na KAPANALIG.

Siya yung walang paki. Oops, parang mali no? Paano magiging kaibigan kung walang paki?

Ang ibig ko lang sabihin, wala siyang paki kung ano ang sasabihin mo, ano ang magiging reaksyon mo, anong magiging pagtingin mo, basta nagsasabi siya ng totoo sa iyo at ikaw sa kanya. Yung walang ekek na drama na kahit isang linggo o isang buwan kayo hindi magkita, alam mong nagtitiwala pa rin siya sa iyo na kahit anong mangyari, isasambulat mo sa kanya ang nangyari sa iyo, at siya naman sa iyo. Walang taguan. Walang sikreto.

Kapanalig keyword: Tiwala
Hindi kapanalig: Ka-tsismisan

Tunay na KAKAMPI.

Isa pang taong walang paki. Walang paki kung sabayan ka sa anumang laban o proyekto mo sa buhay at gamitan ka ng panggising, pangsindak, pangmotivate, pang-encourage, pang-inspire, panggulat, etc. para mapabuti at mapahusay ka sa anumang ginagawa mo.

Kakampi keyword: Kumpiyansa
Hindi kakampi: User

Tunay na KASANGGA.

Siyempre, walang paki ulit. Siya yung tipong ipagtatanggol ka muna bago alamin kung tama ka ba o mali. Kung mali, pagkatapos ka na niya ipagtanggol, saka ka niya aawayin, babatukan, pagagalitan, kukunutan, sesermunan para maitama ka naman.

Kasangga keyword: Panatag
Hindi kasangga: Tambay

Tunay na KABAGANG.

Hehe, walang paki na naman. Wala siyang paki kung saan mo dalhin at saan man kayo magpunta — sa away, sa gulo, sa inuman, sa mall, sa shopping, sa seminar, sa merry-go-round. Hindi mo na kailangang ayain kasi tiyak na hindi siya tatanggi at gagawa ng paraan para magkasama kayo sa adventure at misadventure.

Kabagang keyword: Kuntento
Hindi kabagang: Kaladkarin

Sa ngayon, ito lang yung napatid ng malaya kong utak. Pwedeng madagdagan, pero baka sa susunod na long holiday na lang. Hmm, sa August daw, meron. Hehe.